Disappointment.....

Well, foiled again. As usual RB takes a day off on the day that P and I plan to hook up. Somehow I think she has noticed a a pattern to the phone calls or something and figured out our most likely to meet up day. P finally checked into the email after I sent him a text on how to get in since he had forgotten how to access it. Once in he found the email that I had sent him a few weeks ago describing in detail what I would have done to him had I been with him in his truck on that day. I think it really caught him off guard! I returned from lunch and my boss told me that some man had called me twice while I was at lunch and sounded disappointed that I was not in. I just started to laugh. I knew that he had read that email and was dying to talk. Sure enough, about ten minutes after I got back from lunch, he calls. He asks "what the hell was that?" I laugh and asked if he liked it. He says that he did but now he has a hard-on that he can't get rid of and he has got to be in the truck with this other guy for another 7-8 hours! Guess I got a "rise" from him out of that one! (sorry!)

That night he tries to get me to meet up with him when he gets back into town- at 3:00am! I ask how I am going to explain that one- out for ice cream? I send him a text before I go to bed and tell him " I wish I could be there...." He replies with "you can- 3:00am." Then he sends another one after I have gone to bed so I get to read it the next morning. It said "wish-i-could-shove-my-fat-cock-n-your-tight-ass." That was some wake up call! On Wednesday he calls me and asks what time I get to go to lunch. Unfortunately I had called C about 20 minutes before to tell him that I was actually going to get to go to lunch so it would be impossible to cancel those plans. Damn! Oh well, I wanted more than a quickie anyway.


During one of our conversations P tells me that he came home recently after one of his jobs about 2 or 3 in the morning to find his wife standing in the middle of the bed raising hell at him for how long it had taken him to get home. She thought that it should have taken him about 2 and 1/2 hours to get home and it had taken him 4 hours. He tries to explain to her that it would have been impossible for him to have made it back in that time from the part of the state that he was in and that there was construction on the interstate close to home so he went the long way around to avoid just sitting in traffic. She still refuses to believe him. I made the statement, just joking around with him, that knowing him the way that I do there is no telling what pit stops he may have made along the way. For someone who claims that they are in this just for the sex, he sure got upset that I would think that about him. He asked if he had stopped at my house on the way home and when I replied no he said well then I went home just like I said that I did. Then he asks why "we" don't trust him. I felt kinda bad at that point that he felt that way because I actually do trust him.

Later I sent P an email that I almost regretted sending but it was too late to delete it because he had already read it. Basically in it I told him that I do trust him, that he has always been honest with me (even when it has hurt), that I don't want him to ever feel that he has to lie to me to keep me around and that he knows that there is noting that he cannot talk to me about. Over the last year or so there has been an understanding that we just don't get mushy or really say how we feel, because this is just a fling, right? Anyway, last year after an old friend of ours unexpectedly dies I call to check on P and I tell him that I know that what I am going to say is probably breaking the rules but that I do still care about him. His reply is "I know and that does not go unnoticed." Other than that conversation this has been the only other time that I have expressed any feeling towards him at all and I was afraid that he would run. Instead he tried so hard to see me the next day (twice). Guess I didn't scare him too badly?